Sunday, November 26, 2006

Lindsay Lohan's Days Are Numbered


In this week's "Not Surprising At All" news - the National Enquirer is reporting that an out-of-control Lindsay Lohan overdosed on a deadly cocktail of cocaine and painkillers on Nov. 12. A doctor raced to Hollywood's Chateau Marmont after a friend of the 20-year-old actress found her unconscious in a drug-filled hotel room.

Although the doctor was able to revive the hard-partying star, he was horrified to discover a "stash of cocaine and a pile of prescription drugs" in the room, an insider told The ENQUIRER exclusively. The doctor flushed the cocaine down the toilet and bagged up seven different prescription drugs, according to the insider.

"The doctor insisted, 'This girl had a serious drug overdose. She has to go into a hospital and then into rehab.'" Lindsay refused to be treated at a hospital or enter rehab.


Ok, so it's the National Enquirer, but this might be the most believable story ever printed by the rag.

Ooh Lindsay. So sad. Except not at all.