We didn't make that up. That is the real headline.
A man standing in a checkout line at a NY state ShopRite took out his penis and urinated on the cash register last Friday afternoon, according to police.
By one account, the man stood up on the conveyor belt before relieving himself. Police responded to a report of indecent exposure at the time, but were unable to find the man.
ShopRite officials called it an unfortunate incident and said the register was cleaned and disinfected immediately.
Who hasn't wanted to stand on the grocery store's checkout conveyor belt and piss all over everything?